Monday, June 2, 2014

My {Modest} Story

The first thing you need to know is that I got married to my high school sweetheart on March 22, 2014. We met back in sixth grade (and we both had a crush on each other) but we didn’t begin dating until the very end of our sophomore year.


And this is where the real story begins.

When I was younger, my family went to a Presbyterian church. My parents became “burnt out” after several years of attending and being asked to do more and more and feeling like they were getting nothing in return spiritually. So we stopped going and never went to another church consistently after that. Around the age of 14 or 15 I started to develop a desire to have a home church; somewhere where I felt comfortable, got to know the people, and could deepen my relationship with God and His Son. Not to mention I would feel embarrassed anytime my friends from school would talk about church when I would have to explain that my family didn’t attend a church. But I was pretty young and the rest of my family did not have that desire so what could I really do?

But long story short, as soon as my now husband, Michael, and I began talking he told me how important his church was to him and that I had to visit before we actually started dating. I felt like I had hit the jackpot! Michael never cursed, had no desire to drink alcohol or "party," and was just a nice guy - hard to find in high school sophomores. So I started attending church with him and quickly learned that while his church (which is now my church) states that they are nondenominational, they lean very closely towards Pentecostal. And every single woman wore skirts (to church, not all have the conviction in their lives to wear them everyday).

At first I hated it, I’d grown up wearing pants and I couldn’t imagine wearing skirts full time, let alone to every church event. But as you could guess, the Holy Spirit began working in my life and gradually I became okay with the fact that we had to wear skirts to church. Then I kind of started to like wearing skirts to church. And finally, I felt like I could see myself wearing skirts as a lifestyle. But I was a senior in high school at this point and the thought of starting to wear skirts was way too intimidating to me – my friends would’ve thought I was crazy! So I didn’t. But then it came time for college. I moved into a dorm at a nearby university and I was starting to feel more and more guilty about not wearing skirts. (Side note: When you’re feeling guilty it’s often the Holy Spirit convicting you). But none of the girls in my youth group, besides maybe one or two, wore skirts all the time. So I kept quiet.

Then one day, my friend mentioned to me that she was starting to feel like she should wear skirts and I felt like a big boulder had been lifted off of my shoulders. Another friend heard us excitedly talking and asked us what we were discussing, so we told her. And with a big sigh of relief, she explained how she had been feeling the exact same way. But that wasn’t the end, we didn’t just throw every pair of pants away that we owned never looking back.

Deciding to wear skirts everyday is a very hard, life changing decision, and I wish I could say it happened over night. But it was a struggle for all of us. For about a month we wrestled with it, not exactly sure if it was what we were being called to do, coming up with ridiculously lame excuses to justify ourselves, questioning God, and complaining. We prayed about it, too, of course. But I secretly hoped the answer would be what I wanted, not the Lord’s will. After praying for about a month, we heard the testimony of a girl from our sister church in Des Moines, Iowa. She described how she felt like she was at a spiritual plateau several years earlier, and knew that she needed to make some lifestyle changes starting with the way she dressed. She felt very convicted about it. I was convicted, but I either didn’t realize I was or didn’t care to admit that I was. And she said this simple statement,


“If you don’t have a conviction, pray for one.” 

Especially if you know it’s something you should be doing, pray for a conviction! That statement, for some reason, settled it for me. I realized that it didn’t matter what I wanted, or if wearing skirts everyday made me feel slightly uncomfortable. Because it’s not about what I want, it’s about what God wants!

Several other things that really helped to sway me came from my cousin-in-law, Abby, who grew up in an Apostolic church and has always worn skirts. As my friends and I were complaining that it’s unfair that girls are the ones who have to be uncomfortable and wear skirts, yet guys get to wear pants, she said that she found it to be a “privilege.” We get to wear skirts. I had never viewed it that way, but she went on to explain that as women, we have the privilege to shine our light just through our outward appearance. Men don’t have that privilege quite as often. So slowly, I began to feel honored that God had called me to change my lifestyle to ultimately glorify Him.

It’s been almost four years since I decided to wear skirts, and now I can’t imagine my life any other way. I have truly been blessed for following the calling the Lord put in my life! However that does NOT mean I think any differently towards women who do not dress the way I do. I have many friends who wear pants or shorts, and I’m not here to judge (remember, I’ve worn pants the majority of my life). So yes, my lifestyle may be different from yours. But that is what I love about blogging. I get to know women who have passions for different things, and understand why their passions exist. My hope for this blog is to share my passions and inspire you to do the same.


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